🐥The Paradox of Now #27

Plaque to the Future

Hi people!

I’ve been sat here for ages trying to figure out how to start this week’s newsletter, and absolutely nothing was coming to me.

And yet, somehow, writing that sentence has weirdly become the start itself.

Anyway, I went to the dentist this week and got the all clear.

28 years old and still rocking 0 fillings.

At this point I’m starting to think the newsletter should be about dental hygiene, not improving our small corner of the world.

So if anyone wants some top-tier brushing tips, drop me a message.

If you’re lucky, I’ll send you an ASMR voice note of me flossing or something.

Now let me give you a taste of what's coming:

🐥 My favourite tv chef
🐥 Ant and Dec’s thoughts on daily habits
🐥 A New Years dodgy game of death

🥚Eggstra News🥚

Your weekly dose of some fascinating and fun finds:

🍳Matty Matheson: Just a Dash – My favourite chef, unhinged in all the right ways. These cooking videos are indescribably brilliant.

📸Case Kenny – Has been a big inspo for my Instagram vibe. Clean quotes, good vibes, lovely messages.

📸 Polaroid Printer – Polaroid pics in seconds. Who doesn’t want that?

The Paradox of Now

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I’m also on the following social media channels:

• Instagram - The Paradox of Now

• LinkedIn - Scott Mayo

Want to feature here? Message me on socials and let’s see what we can do.

Doing Things Dailyish

Atomic Habits by James Clear is one of the books that’s had the biggest impact on my life. I genuinely believe everyone should read it.

It could be on prescription. Handed out on the NHS to help people stop smoking for example.

The funny thing about books, though, is that we probably only remember 0.01% of what we read.

And part of me thinks I’ve written about this before. But if that stat bleeds over into newsletters, you’ve likely forgotten what I said anyway.

That’s fine. I have too... and I wrote it!

I read Atomic Habits about two years ago and I’ve been tempted to pick it up again recently. I’ve been struggling. Not catastrophically, not dramatically. Just in a can’t-quite-put-my-finger-on-it kind of way.

I think it’s tied to having low forgiveness and high expectations of myself.

Oh boo-hoo, I get it. This isn’t a sympathy message. More of a written check-in with myself to see if anything useful shakes loose once I let my thoughts hit the page.

Anyway, back to James Clear. My two main takeaways were:

• Habit stacking

• Never miss twice

Both of these helped me a lot. Still do.

But they’ve also made me question a few of my own habits. Are the things I do every day actually making me feel better? Or have they just become boxes to tick?

Let me give you an example.

For the first time this year, I missed a day.

I didn’t even do a backup note on my phone or scribble something out on a piece of paper. And with just six pages left in my current journal, I’d technically failed what I set out to do…

Or had I?

Journalling, like pickleball, has always been an escape. A sanctuary. A safe space.

But recently, those lines have blurred. My game has wobbled. The citadel has been under siege. And the weirdest part? The guards are mine.

Journalling started to feel like a chore. A task. Something I had to do.

It became just another item on the to-do list. Not the meditative moment it once was. Not the evening ritual I used to look forward to.

Maybe I took James Clear too literally.

I still believe in what he says. I still use the ideas. But somewhere along the way, I got a bit rigid. A bit stiff.

Then I remembered a word I once heard from Oliver Burkeman. A word that softened everything:

Dailyish means doing something regularly, but not religiously. More than twice a week, but maybe not seven times. For me, that might look like journalling five or six times a week. Still consistent. Still valuable. But no longer chained to perfection.

And just to be clear, I’m talking here about the routines and habits we choose. The voluntary ones. I know there are non-negotiables in life, but this is about the extras. The add-ons. The things we bring into our lives because they’re meant to serve us.

So take a minute. Think about your habits. Your routines. The tasks you label as “good” for you. Are they creating a net positive? Or slowly draining you?

Are they giving you energy or just something else to feel guilty about?

So what catastrophic event occurred in my life because I missed one day of journalling?

Absolutely nothing.

We set our own expectations. But sometimes we set the bar in such a strange way. We hit our goals and call it the bare minimum. Anything less feels like failure. Anything achieved is just… expected.

But here’s the truth:

You haven’t plateaued.

You haven’t failed.

You haven’t gone backwards because you did not live up to the expectations you set yourself.

And the answers? They’ve always been in front of you. You just needed to take a step back and actually see them.

You are at your best when you enjoy the process. When you’re in the pursuit. When you’re in flow. Just like I’ve been, writing this now. Fingers glued to the keyboard for the last 20 minutes.

So yes, be more forgiving with yourself.

And if you’re not, then don’t be too harsh about that either.

Let me close with a statement I’ve been brave enough to challenge and question recently:

I believe it. I believe it so much I’ve literally tattooed it onto myself in ice-cream metaphor.

But lately, I’ve noticed that all my comparisons have been with people ahead of me. People smashing it. People soaring.

And maybe, just maybe, if you compare yourself to the average instead, you’ll realise you’re not doing too badly.

If this is my plateau, I’ll take it. I’ve achieved a lot in a sport I only recently picked up. I’ve written words that have made people stop, reflect, and sometimes cry. I’ve become a friend to myself for the first time in a long time.

If that’s where I stay?

Not bad, my friend.

But I’m not done yet. Not in everything, anyway.

Some things I’ll leave behind. But others? I’m ready to go again.

I’ll keep chasing the process. Embracing the dailyish life. Loving the slow and steady becoming.

With a constant reminder to celebrate the small wins along the way and to only compare myself with the me of yesterday.

No one else.

And this acts as a gentle reminder for you to also do the same.

Because being a friend to yourself first, is how we all can come together and improve our small corner of the world.

🐥 Haiku’s Haiku 🐥

If a duck and a sabre-tooth tiger had a baby… this is probably it.

If that’s the sort of informative content you were after today, then I have done my job.

Sick.

🌴 Palm Tree Euphoria 🌴

Every new year, me and the boys play a game. We each pick three celebrities we think might… well… not make it through the year.

Bit grim? Maybe.

Weirdly entertaining? Absolutely.

There are rules. No one over 80. No known health conditions.

We keep it respectful-ish.

It’s £10 to the winner per correct guess.

With 18 players, that’s a decent little pot.

This year? We’ve already had two winners.

Most recently, one of them correctly predicted Hulk Hogan.

RIP.

If you’ve got a slightly dark sense of humour and nothing to do between Christmas and New Year, give it a go.

Life’s short… and clearly finite.

See you next week Dashing Ducks! 🐥

P.S. if this morbid little tradition gave you a guilty chuckle, forward it to a fellow duckling with a dark sense of humour and a spreadsheet ready.

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